Sometimes we do just grow up all at once.

[jackshoegazer]

My living room contains three thirteen-year old boys who have spent the night eating pizza and junk food, watching zombie movies and playing video games.  Funny, not much has changed since I was thirteen.  Well, the video games look a helluva lot cooler.  Earlier in the day, we took the boys to the pool, ate cake and opened presents.  It's been a fun time.  I think, however, that I will go to bed soon.

I leave for Salt Lake the day after tomorrow.  When I was diagnosed with this heart problem back in 2001, I was overly confident and dismissive - it was nothing, I would be fine, et cetera.  Now, I believe I have a healthy respect for the seriousness of my problem and for its solution and thus, I am good and properly worried.  I do think I'll be fine, but I've lost the patina of invincibility that shines so brightly on our youth.  Again, this is healthy, this is mature.

I never mentioned it in my journal, but a while back, kiwikat and I had a bit of a falling out and now we've patched up our friendship, which is very nice.  It's very good to have my friend back.  In view of this, and perhaps illuminated by my upcoming surgery, I keep thinking maybe I should drop an email or whatnot to other people in my past, whether they deserve it or not.  Just to apologize for the wrong-doings on my end.  Clear my plate, pay my half of the tab.  If they choose to run out on their half, it's not my problem - I've dealt with my responsibility.  I'm getting too old to dine-and-dash.  Metaphorically.   And literally I suppose as well. 

Comments

[helpimarock.livejournal.com]

Hey, man, I just wanted to stop in real quick and wish you (and Ethan!) happy birthday and wish you the best of luck with the surgery. I actually have the fullest confidence that you'll be fine, but giving a little extra luck can't hurt! :)

[jackshoegazer.livejournal.com]

Thank you on all counts :D Your confidence and positivity are excellent. Gratzi!