From: Get Your War On

[jackshoegazer]

In honor of Earth Day, I present these eco-jokes.

1. What is Mother Nature’s favorite food?      RECYCLED GARBAGE.

2. What did the endangered species say to the Exxon executive who was telling jokes?     STOP, YOU’RE KILLING ME.

3. Why did the chicken cross the road?     TO ESCAPE THE HORRIBLE CONDITIONS AT THE TYSON FOODS PROCESSING PLANT.

4. What did Global Warming say to James Inhofe?     “IT’S TRULY INSANE THAT YOU DON’T BELIEVE IN ME.”

5. What’s the difference between the fossil-fuel industry and an unstoppable plague of flesh-eating bacteria?    NOT MUCH, REALLY, WHEN YOU CONSIDER THE LONG-TERM IMPACT OF BOTH.

Comments

[jeffinreallife.livejournal.com]

"Flesh eating bacteria" is actually a misnomer.
necrotising fasciitis is caused by otherwise relatively-harmless Staphylococcus Aureus, or Group-A Streptococcus taking advantage of an immunocompromised host. The bacteria don't actually eat flesh, the toxins they produce just cause a lot of tissue damage.

But, I really like the second joke.

[jackshoegazer.livejournal.com]

Thanks for that. I am much less paranoid about flesh-eating bacteria now!

[jeffinreallife.livejournal.com]

It's the flesh eating monkeys that should be keeping you up at night.

[jackshoegazer.livejournal.com]

They already do! I wake up every time they bite me!