April Fool's Day Cancelled Due To Lack Of Interest

[jackshoegazer]

Posted: 05:50 AM ET

By John D. Sutter

London, England (CNN) – In a bizarre turn of events, not one single person on the entire planet was fooled by an April Fool's Day gag. The lack of quality gags, plus a severe bout of apathy experienced worldwide, has turned April Fool's Day into just another boring entry on the calendar.

Thank goodness, I hate this effing holiday.