To me, a dynamic sexual relationship is crucial to a healthy emotional relationship, and it's possible to channel those lusts together and be, as Dan Savage has said, "total whores for one another; because that's love."
I think it's really powerful that Irving had the balls (no pun intended either) to protray Garp as doing his worst work when he's at his worst personally. So many people fall into a trap where they think they need to suffer to create; they need to be a cheating, lying alcoholic to be a better writer. Being in a committed relationship isn't seen as bohemian, sexy, or creative enough, with the rare exception of iconic muse sorts of relationships.
Lust's power is in its ability to take control and guide us on its own path, a path of distraction and dishonesty (in that we're allowing something else to contradict our otherwise steadfast beliefs and actions). If you have a healthy expression of lust, however, you control its manifestation. This is one of the reason I (and Dan Savage has also said this) think that it's important to always be exploring in a relationship, to constantly be new people for one another sexually and intimately, while maintaining that root, that core.
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Date: 2006-04-22 04:23 pm (UTC)I think it's really powerful that Irving had the balls (no pun intended either) to protray Garp as doing his worst work when he's at his worst personally. So many people fall into a trap where they think they need to suffer to create; they need to be a cheating, lying alcoholic to be a better writer. Being in a committed relationship isn't seen as bohemian, sexy, or creative enough, with the rare exception of iconic muse sorts of relationships.
Lust's power is in its ability to take control and guide us on its own path, a path of distraction and dishonesty (in that we're allowing something else to contradict our otherwise steadfast beliefs and actions). If you have a healthy expression of lust, however, you control its manifestation. This is one of the reason I (and Dan Savage has also said this) think that it's important to always be exploring in a relationship, to constantly be new people for one another sexually and intimately, while maintaining that root, that core.